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pacarroll99

A Poem to my Autistic Son - You rent my heart asunder

Updated: Jan 21, 2020

While doing some spring cleaning, I came upon some creative writing from when my son was very young. The below poem was written when Vaughn was six weeks old. Deprived of sleep, I was nonetheless basking in the pure physicality of a newborn son. In reflection, I can see some of the influence of Walt Whitman and Sylvia Plath on my writing.


You rent my heart asunder

And whatever you will assume, I shall assume

In all your stars I lose to your touch, only myself

And to your voice, illegible

Shrunk in your shadow

Surrendering to your unknowable


You stand before me a tower

Your stars, your crown, they deafened me,

Sunk me with the power of your immensity

Which, finger to closed finger, open me up

Until such time again where

You will rent my heart asunder




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